Ghostly Oddities, Part II

Good day, ghostlings! Look at me, I’m on the beach!

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Virginia Beach to be exact. A locale I picked almost completely at random. There’s little to do except chill out and imbibe the touristy coastal atmosphere and that’s exactly what I’m going to do for the next day or two.

Two nights ago I stayed with my friend and former boss Judy at her home in Raleigh, North Carolina. When I got there I realized that she’d been avidly following my blog, and I was presented with this delightful surprise:

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The route isn’t 100% accurate, but very, very close.

It’s actually kind of surreal to look at this map. Did I really do all of that? My whole life feels like a timeless oblivion at this point. The days go by fast and yet I feel like I’ve been at this forever. I look at photos I took just a couple weeks ago and recall the moments I took them with a nostalgia more appropriate for a years-old vacation. This is my 30th post. How am I ever going to re-adjust to normal life?

Judy and her husband live in a posh little suburb of Raleigh. Their driveway is long and slopes downward and when I backed up out of there the morning after my stay I swung my car too far to the left and got stuck in this little brick-inlaid ditch behind their mailbox. It was one of those moments where you briefly think to yourself it would be better to die immediately than live for one second longer in that particular situation. With her husband’s help I managed to extricate the car, but not without denting their mailbox in the process. So I owe them both a new mailbox, which I’ll pay for as soon as I get a sponsor for this blog (laugh along with me, folks).

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But then again, why worry about money when I’m about to be condemned to hell?

Anyway, today’s post is the second in my series of “Ghostly Oddities”; the images, sounds and stories that are too quirky to fit into any particular narrative. It’s really one of my favorite aspects of this Tour; all the little oddball moments that can’t be googled, sought out or paid for, they just happen. So…. here we go!

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Near a cemetery in Oxford, Georgia. Someone vandal apparently took issue with the city’s street directions.
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A gorgeous home selling adorable little birdhouses in Atlanta. This is right by the Martin Luther King, Jr. house.

In an Atlanta public park, I passed by a guy sitting on a bench, earbuds in his ear, calling to no one in particular, “Nineteen seventy six, Parliament Funkadelic! You don’t know nothin’ ’bout dat… when he land dat muthafuckin’ SPACE-ship!” 

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In a slightly shady part of Atlanta. Something hauntingly poignant about this message.
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Ellijay, Georgia. What I like about this image is that it manages to incorporate God, the American flag, and Minions.

Somewhere in Western North Carolina I saw a sign marking the distance to Asheville in both miles and kilometers. My guess is that this is a holdover from the late 1970s, when the U.S. government made a half-assed attempt to convert the entire nation to the Metric system. 

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From Austin. One of the best sandwich boards I’ve ever seen.
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Also from Austin. I didn’t try this, but I really should have. It’s just such a ridiculous idea.

When I first drove into Virginia I saw a highway sign reading “Radar Detection Devices are Illegal.” I had yet to see a sign targeting that particular crime, why is it a big priority in Virginia?

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Near the Carter museum in Atlanta. A sign with… nothing on it. Okay.
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From my uncle and aunt’s house in Covington, Georgia. This plant pot had a sister at the other end of the table who was lush and green and clearly got all the attention from mom and dad.
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Asheville, North Carolina. Not really sure what I like about this image, I just dig it.
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From the Carter museum. Part of Jimmy’s campaign to get American’s to cut their energy usage.
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Would anyone be surprised that this gem came from Texas?
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In the men’s room of an Atlanta BBQ joint.
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This is actually really cool because there’s a story behind it. Back in the 1840s when Texas was an independent nation, president Sam Houston wanted to relocate the capital from Austin to his namesake city. When he failed to do that by legal means he sent a military detachment to Austin to snatch the government archives away. An innkeeper named Angelina Eberly noticed the shenanigans and fired the town cannon, blowing a hole in the Land Office building and rousing the citizens to overtake Sam Houston’s men and take the archives back. Only in Texas.

That’s all for now. You’ll get more updates on my day(s) at the beach tomorrow!

 

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